Thursday, July 31, 2008

I've been so busy, yes productively so, that I almost forgot to post! That's a good thing.

Today I'm juggling a couple things. Aren't all of us WAHMS juggling a couple things every minute of our lives? Like Lynn's post - I can't ever seem to catch up and hate the guilt that comes with not being caught up -or feeling like I should be working. I've also come to realize that those days off when I get farther behind are the days that I'm "living" my life.

Last night I watched the special on Randy Pausch, he wrote "the last lecture". I didn't realize he had died. I've seen him before on Oprah, I think or another show. I've thought about getting his book, watching the whole lecture, but just haven't done it yet. So inspiring to listen to him and his wife, in previous interviews with Diane Sawyer, about how they live their lives, what's important.

Yeah, we all hear the stories, vow to change, vow to stop and smell the flowers and cherish every moment of our lives - regardless of how far behind we are, how much our kids are whining and fighting and how we might be struggling to pay the bills.

I think this time I just might be able to follow thru. Think about "how important is this" before I say or do something. I've got the serenity prayer under the glass on my desk. Read it everyday. There are lots of days when I just don't know how to change the things I can, how NOT to TRY to change the things I can't and pray for the wisdom to know the difference!

I don't get it right very often:) But knowing that I do sometimes keeps me trying!

At the end of June I was told that I needed to have a biopsy on my left boob - is it ok with you if I don't say breast?! I went thru the panic, the fear, the "why me", the "why not me" days. The wondering if the results didn't go my way if I would have the strength to get thru it. Then, it occurred to me that I wasn't THERE yet. This was a biopsy, I hadn't been diagnosed yet. I have no family history of breast cancer and trust me, there isn't alot of breast to hide it in here. I found that I could change the way I looked at the situation, couldn't change the fact that I had to have surgery, and that I had the wisdom, or really common sense to know the difference.

It's been a couple weeks and reality has set in. I'm fine, healthy, but with a nice scar to remind me of how lucky - blessed I am to "just" have a scar. I'm trying to "live every moment" and trying to let my stress over not getting everything done roll off my shoulders at the end of every day.

Final notes - it's actually Thursday now, never finished this yesterday! Please ladies, have your mammograms, do your self exams, go to the doctor! Life is a beautiful thing, no matter how much stress we have in it. I may never get all of my to-do lists done, but as long as my heart is full and my family is happy, I'll be good:) I'm going to take my kids to the pool now - I'll work on that list later.....

2 comments:

Jill said...

great post. I put it off a year longer than I should have, but i had my mammogram on monday!

Lynn - the piggy bank painter said...

Had mine about a month ago. This post gives me things ot think about. BUsiness has been stressing me out, but I don't know what to do about it.